i hate this feeling. i’m angry and don’t really know why. i hate being such an external processor. having feelings just bump around on the inside and feeling so agitated and having NO CLUE what’s really going on. i mean i could focus on the simple surface stuff… but that doesn’t really get me anywhere. and when i point my agitation at the only person i have to really talk to – that doesn’t help either. it just means i have to sit around a little longer feeling like slapping everyone and not knowing why.