Construction Zone and Halloween Fallout

I think i had been asleep for two hours when the nail gun woke me up at midnight. Our stairs have changed residence and we will soon have new bedrooms and eventually a kitchen (WITH a stove, thank you) – and if the gods smile upon me – our bathroom will grow up and gain a tub. At this point in pregnancy and looking in the face of having a baby in the house again, the tub ALLLLLLmost trumps the kitchen. ALmost. It’s a close one.

So yesterday we get a call from the kid’s school – at 8:30 – Arden had thrown up. Apparently all over his clothes b/c he came home in some other kid’s emergency clothes (yes i forgot to send his) – and I thought – great. a stomach virus to go around and me pregnant – yes it was a totally selfish realization. Chloe had also been complaining about her stomach and when i called to ask her teacher how she was she had already asked Chloe if she was ok because she looked funny. So, they were both back home and in their jammies by 9am. and then… nothing. and some time went by and still…. nothing. Then it hit me. i had been at work all day on Tuesday. The day after the bucket loads of candy came home from our first trick or treating adventure… evidently the trick was on us. The kids LITERALLY ate themselves sick. Chloe is just now over her tummy ache. Now i won’t say i exactly blame Elijah for letting them eat candy till they puked… but you know… yes, he’s renovating our apartment. He was a tad distracted. Good life lesson for the kids anyway, right? geez. i’ve never heard of such a thing.

The worst thing i can remember me and my sister doing was going out in flip flops in the snow. hee hee. i think it was me who got stuck. you have no idea how hard it is to walk in snow in flip flops and keep them on your feet. shockingly hard. There was an old school bus parked out by our house and i ended up holed up in there till i was rescued. i was 5 – she was 10. seriously, she just threw me to the wolves – the ice wolves. i bet she thought it was funny.

I suppose they’ll do worse at some point. then again i could just close my eyes, cross my fingers and hope this is as bad as it ever gets. a little puke, some stranger’s emergency clothes and a couple days of recovery time… geez, sounds like a wild party. i hope for their sake’s that they are able to let the consequences of their not-so-great choices teach them.

of course they teach me all the time. i had one of those moments tonight. in an attempt to needle chloe into getting her homework done faster i started picking at her. just “trying to be funny” and when she started whining i told her – “well, ARDEN had a huge stack of make-up work to do, and he just sat down and did his. if you’d just do what HE did you’d be done by now.” with that note, she picked up her school work and stormed out of the room… which of course i wasn’t going to put up with a tantrum, so i made her come back to me. as i was bent down (eye level like Nanny Jo tells all good parents to do) it suddenly hit me that she had stormed off because i had been teasing her. so i apologized. and she sniffed and went back to her seat to finish her homework. but in about 20 seconds busted out crying again. i said – “what in the world Chloe? what’s wrong?” and she said (through her agony and tears) “I don’t know, i’m just upset.” And then i realized the rest. I called her over to me and i wrapped her up in my arms and i asked her to please forgive me – I did two bad things. #1, I teased her. #2 I compared her to Arden – telling her if she’d just be like her brother she’d be better. So i cuddled her and loved on her, truly sorry for what i had done… and then she was fine. she was giggling and finishing her homework and it was over. Over. no grudge – and i got extra hugs tonight.

i can be so mean. i can be so short sighted – so focused on just getting the result i want out of a situation. chloe is 7, so my teasing and comparing made her cry. how easy would it have been to overlook the effects on a more hardened soul? one who can excuse away what i did and said b/c they knew i was “just joking”… but i really was trying to pressure her to do what i wanted. it was a terrible thing to say to her and i’m so thankful that my daughter’s heart is soft. and i’m so thankful that i can hear the Holy Spirit chastising me when i’m a meanie. those are the kinds of things that cause a life time of damage. the kind you grow up and go to counseling over. i’m so glad she is quick to forgive. i want to be just like her when i grow up.

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One thought on “Construction Zone and Halloween Fallout

  1. Im sorry goes so far with our kids! Admitting we all mess up and owning up to it teaches our kids invaluable lessons! Been there done that and never been sorry for admitting my mistakes and asking forgiveness. What a real way to teach humility and forgiveness to our kids.

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